Office Design

The monk approached me with a knowing smile, bowing deeply as he stopped in front of my packed bags.

‘Master Li,’ I said with reverence, ensuring my returned bow was deeper still. He walked forward, placing his gentle hands on top of my suitcase and fixing me with a soft look.

‘It must be so?’ he asked, voice ringing through my small chambers like a bell. It struck me that it was one of only a handful of times where I had heard the man speak.

‘Yes,’ I said, solemnly. I had made no secret of my sadness at having to leave this place – its unique solitude and serenity, a meditative spirit that surged from every pore of the all-encompassing rock. ‘It is my time, I think.’

‘Your time?’ he said with an infectious chuckle. ‘So serious! Your time is your time, to do with as you desire. What is it that you desire, then?’

‘I have to return to Melbourne,’ I told him. ‘My calling awaits me.’

‘You arrived here without a calling, I remember,’ he said. ‘What has revealed itself to you?’

I leaned in close, fighting desperately to quell the un-monklike excitement that bubbled within me. ‘Office design,’ I whispered to my spiritual teacher.

‘Office… what?’ He frowned at me.

‘Melbourne office design,’ I said, a grin splitting my face. ‘It’s my passion. I understand that now.’

‘I’m afraid I… do not,’ he said, frown deepening on his normally-placid features. ‘How can this have struck you so?’

‘A dream, Master,’ I explained. ‘I had a dream.’

‘A dream?’

‘Yes!’ I exclaimed, all pretences of zen abandoned as I all but leapt onto my bed. ‘I had a vision of a life where I executed on office space design trends in Melbourne, and it was…’

My voice wavered slightly, my eyes growing misty.

‘It was nirvana, Master,’ I whispered. ‘A total and complete heaven, just for me.’

The man nodded slowly, his grin returning with practised ease.

‘This is what you wish?’ he asked me.

I nodded.

‘Ah,’ he said. ‘Then you are an idiot.’

And he left my room.

I clung, quivering, to the outside of the glass, cursing myself for being so stupid. What did I think was going to happen if I attempted this heist by myself? It was risky and dangerous – and that was before my harness had snapped, sending my anchor rope tumbling a hundred feet to the ground below.

And left me clinging to the outside of a skyscraper with nothing but some suction cups and a less-than-healthy hyperventilation habit.

I pressed myself against the cold glass, as the wind began to buffet me in earnest, as if it knew I wasn’t supported anymore and was striking for its chance at taking me. I could picture it so clearly, my ragdoll body twisting in the air as I plummeted towards the—

No, I snapped my brain back into focus, forcing myself to look inside the office I’d been about to rob. Concentrate on the inside, not the outside.

It was a lovely commercial office design, for Melbourne at least. I’d seen nicer designs in some of the European capitals, but Melbourne had a certain charm, with its insistence on glass and wood.

Nerves momentarily under my control again, I reached into my back pocket for the cutting implement I’d been storing there. I’d meant to use it on a window three stories up – my actual target – but I figured all of the glass was probably the same thickness.

Well… prayed it was the same thickness.

I found the implement, pressing it against the window firmly and scraping it to make a hole that was roughly me-shaped. The Melbourne office fitout trends were on my side for this one – there was nothing pressed directly against the window – just a clear shot between me and some patterned carpet.

I continued to cut and twist, forcing myself to exact precise lines – the sloppiness that my rattled brain and body demanded of me would only ensure I never made it inside. Precision was the key. Precision was the—

With a crash, the glass gave way, and it shrieked as I tumbled inside.

Safe.